They're BAAACK!

Just arrived from holidaying and I'll get the pix uploaded soon...that is if I don't procrastinate and I'm finished with everything (including having some good old-fashioned "nothing" time. just sitting and staring at toenails pathetically. it's a nice practice.) Let's hope it's by the end of this year!

I'm too darn lazy to upload photos now, even though it's only nine. Jetlag's got me--it feels like one in the morning. Vacation was sooo deliciously warm and tickly (don't judge) and wonderfully mind-rotting. Mmm. It's freezing now, so I might as well get on with this blogpost, though so I can get to sleep.

Vacationing Books DOs and Don'ts:

Don't...bring that very bestest book in the world that you've read six million times and the cover's nostalgically worn in and that's only pictures and weighs about two thousand pounds (I tip my hat off to Henry and the Purple Crayon)

bring three paperback copies of the same exact edition of Gone With the Wind (ahem.)

bring more than 3 books unless you're going on a month-long "vacation" when in reality you are escaping the country to a remote village in the West Indies because you have been falsely accused of committing a truly heinous crime that you will eventually write a book about and find your true love and rescue your hat and....I've watched Indiana Jones too many times. No, really I stick by this as a self-induced rule (but no one said how large the books can be. wink, wink).

Do...bring any book that is incredibly hard to get through but you must finish it for a deadline. I've been there. You'll be bored out of your mind during the travel, so, might as well. Just make sure it isn't a hardback copy or a rare edition. You can just leave those for me...

bring large paperback books

bring a GOOD book

I brought:

The Christmas Carol
by: Charles Dickens (Vintage Charles Dickens edition)
I love this edition. It comes with two bonus stories and it has a gorgeous cover. Plus it's appropriately in season. All I need now is a mug o' hot cocoa and some ridiculously large marshmallows. And a puppy. And a unicorn. And a pony.

The Phoenix and the Carpet (mentioned in the last post. go read it.)
Edith Nesbit

Oooh, I can't wait till break again! And I haven't seen the new HP movie! SHAME!

The Novelmaven

bookworm, harold, dickens

The Singing Bass

I have, for the first time today, seen the legendary "Singing Bass" mounted on a wooden board, and apparently, made of plastic? I don't know. All I know is that it is quite frightening.

On vacation now, so it's a little difficult for me to upload photos--but once I'm done I promise I'll have a buttload (boatload? bushload?).

Reading Phoenix and the Carpet. I was obssessed with Five Children and It in fourth, third grade, but I never quite got around to reading this one. Go Edith Nesbit! She has such an innocent, pure, and classic way of writing. Always makes me feel at home.

I promise I'll have the photos soon.

Mooshers!

The Novelmaven

Nighttime Routines

Barbra Streisand is genius beyond genius. I always have an affinity for old movies (don't we all???) "Don't Rain on My Parade" and "Funny Girl" seem to always top my list that I occasionally write out for "Fresh Talent Show Songs" and I always seem to chicken out afterwards. Nowadays it's hard to find a song that no one has sung in the past five years and Glee certainly isn't going to stop for another, I assume (and DEARLY hope) three seasons...it certainly reminds me of a never-ending talent show.

So, anyway, why I had that little shpiel in the beginning there was because I <3 broadway (ode to cheesiness), but, strangely enough, my bedside-falling-asleep-audio (not exactly successful for falling asleep) has not been my Wicked, Cabaret, Guys and Dolls, Bye Bye Birdie, etc. etc. CD. It has been this:

What is THIS you may wonder? Aha, it is my Mozart CD + Nature Sounds = makes me feel old. *sighs* It is very, very relaxing however. I haven't been getting enough sleep, which is probably due to the fact that I read right before bed, and then subsequently forget that the time is creeping into the wee hours of the morning....but anyways, this helps. A whole lot. I just have to make sure I go to the bathroom beforehand. (cough, water sounds) And though those beautiful concertos are sporadically punctuated by the squawk of some wild bird, it is a pretty good sleep-inducer.

I also wear this before bed...

Elle Woods moment...okay, let me explain.
My mom loves eyemasks, so the obvi (I hate that word, which is precisely the reason I must ridiculously sprinkle it here and there...although I'm not sure I'm using it in the correct context.) thing to do was go to the dollar section and buy one. And then forget to give it to her. And use it instead. Because it's comfortable and those glow-in-the-dark stars are really beginning to bug you.

And books.

My nighttime reads. Actually I've finished these, so I can caboodle a bit on them.

Now, I know I'm way behind the bandwagon for Memoirs of a Geisha, but frankly, these past, what, three, two years have been busy!!! No, for me it was just one of those books I always promised myself I was going to read, flipped around the pages, and had it end up sitting on my shelf for a very long time and I am so inexpressibly happy that I was able to pick it up again. I should write a haiku for it, about its details details details and witty moments and its inexplicable ability to make you feel like you want to hurl about some bits but still love it at the same time and make you have the urge to stand up as a proud feminist.

Onto Safe Haven. This is what Safe Haven is supposed to make you feel like....Let me diverge for a second...

I don't usually read Nicholas Sparks. Nah, who am I kidding, I NEVER read Nicholas Sparks. (Although isn't my thumb gorgeous?)  Well, anyway I decided to pick up Safe Haven. It was good. Ahem. (That "good" says a lot, doesn't it?) I don't know, it's one of those books that attempts to be a romance, drama, and action-packed adventure all in one and is...good...but not gripping-the-edge-of-your-seat-but-in-my-case-bed-post-because-I-don't-read-in-a-chair. So, the picture above...supposed to be frightening but really makes you want to find out what's in that pink and white bottle. Kind of like a book I know...nix the pink and white bottle full of earring cleaner.

When I have time...so, like, never, I watch this. I know the theme song by heart and have seen all but two episodes. It's sad.

Mooshers!

The Novelmaven

It feels like rain today...

Ever have one of those days where you feel so darn cloudy and the weather is deliciously warm and perfect and the sky is blue and untroubled so that you feel the whole darn world is mocking you?

No?

Hmmm...that might explain something.

Anyway, that's how I feel today. Like that scene in Back to the Future where a whole cartload of stinky fertilizer is dumped on the guy's new convertible (slick, huh?) and then in the second movie, it happens all over again. Yup, I feel like I've just starred in a movie that was a spin-off of a movie that kind of sucked and was the evil dude whose car just got a bucketload of poop on....twice.

I'm reading EAT PRAY LOVE. It's ironic, I know, and a little too late (cough, four, cough, years) and I'm not reading it just because the movie's coming out (although it does make me want to wriggle in skinny jeans and have that sublimely enlightened expression Julia Roberts has when she eats tart gelato...who gets that stuff anyway? It's gross. And who eats it without the funky spoons???). I've been meaning to read it for a while. Okay, for, like, years, but I got caught up in so much schtuff...Like SO MUCH SCHTUFF.

okay, I must discuss EAT PRAY LOVE. I think that, while I love Liz, I mean, who doesn't, and I totally want to be best buddies with her and eat gelato and pasta all day long (no, really, 1/3 of the book is eating gelato and pasta....hence the EAT), I think she justifies herself too much. No, I'm not talking about the part where she fervently makes out with the tree or the whole LOVE part of the book. I just don't think you have an excuse for eating pasta, pizza, and whatnot and making it seem like the end of the world if you don't, and then going off to India to shed wordly desires. And then back to Bali to wriggle into the worldliness again. It's all so contradictory and so constantly self-justifying that the whole book sounds like WANT WANT WANT and CAN CAN CAN. And then subsequently can't can't can't and won't won't won't.

Not hating on it however, not that I have any right to. I really do enjoy the book and I hope to see the movie....soon....if I don't get caught up into too much SCHTUFF....




smiley/frowny, spoons

these crazy, hazy, lazy days of suuumer....

Me: When did summer fly by so fast?
Me: Um...two days ago.

Yes, that dreamy, delusional persona of myself vs. the realistic, practical, and rather taciturn version. I happen to think of the dreamy persona as a bit of a flake, someone who I may now and then revisit, but who usually stays buried in memories of the past that I wish to forget, yet are still brought up as anecdotes in family gatherings. Oh, haha. Example/Storytime!!!:

Once upon a time, a long long time ago, there were four people in a room--an aunt who gets five manicures a week, a parent, a too-curious let's-stuff-a-carrot-down-the-disposal-and-see-what-happens child, and yours truly. They were attending an evil gathering also known as a FAMILY REUNION.

"Remember that one time when (fill in proper noun) did this?"
"Oh, and remember when (fill in proper noun) did that? That was funny. And then that poor snail--"
"The poor snail! Hahaha! The snail story! Remember that story?"
(someone else, probably younger) "What snail?"
"Well, your cousin (fipn) was always wondering--"
Me, in a corner, grumbling. "You've told that story thirty two times. It really isn't that funny."
"Don't exaggerate. And don't interrupt. Anyway--"
"No, really, 32 times. I've counted."
"Shut up! I want to hear the story."

The end.

The moral of the story is: Don't go to family reunions. And always wash your feet. And don't stick carrots down the garbage disposal.

Aren't I GOOD at story-telling?

I'm exhausted today. Too much school.

Goodbye!

carrot, storytime

shorts are synonymous with underwear.

my first day of school (again).
apparently, all the girls forgot the dress code and decided to wear shorts. and by that I mean a shirt with maybe, like, a fringe on the bottom and then legs. And some girls can't pull of shorts. they really can't. (ahem. moi) Of course, I wore jeans because I like to be decent and I am aware of the fact that abercrombie shorts really don't fit me and I won't try to squeeze myself into one of them, squealing, "FIT, FIT, FIT" and then say I look hot. And of course, I HAD to try and be decent on a ninety-degree temperature day.

 what my head feels like: picture RIGHT

isn't this fun?

okay, enough with my satirical rant.
books I'm going to read:

Night: by Elie Wiesel

Frankenstein: by Mary Shelley, whom I admire greatly (I mean, a classic at eighteen!!! although the Bronte sisters and Austen did about the same thing. children! writing! HOORAY! I think the reason why I'm yaying is because it's a wonderful example, it really is. Bravo SHELLEY!)

wow, my book list is starting to sound depressing.

Twilight: by Stephanie Myers
those poor things.

HAHAHAHAHA! no, just kidding. here's the rest of the real book list:

To Kill a Mockingbird by: Harper Lee ( I SO love reading in a Louisiana accent in my head. Actually, I love any excuse to do a Louisiana accent. It'd actually be great to visit Louisiana. I mean, gumbo? come on.) I know that the photo below is the same copy from Pretty Little Liars. Let's just be good friends and forgive each other in this matter. And forgive the fact that I know that.

and Penny from Heaven by: Jennifer L. Holm (A ridiculously good book. I'm re-reading it. and re-reading it, and re-reading it.....) It's a REALLY PRETTY COVER.

CATS! (My "journal, although technically, I cannot keep a journal.)

HI-CHEW! AHH-CHOO. Cool candy. Cool name


 

have a good school year!!!!
garsheties, what a long blog!

The Novelmaven

My summer in a nutshell. A very, very tiny nutshell. A poppy seed nutshell. Wait...that would be a seedshell...hmm.

Summer is coming to a close.
*sigh*
It is a happysad moment. You feel that those long, warm days of summer, spent on the couch (which is sticking to your thighs, which you wish were smaller, if you're a girl.), while watching reruns and hearing the crickets chirp in the humid summer air, which is smothering you--I find the experience akin to receiving hugs from post-P.E. boys who don't bother to use deodorant, were beautifully relaxing and you quite regret not appreciating them. Of course, at the time, you were probably feeling depressed, alone, and wondering why your friends, whom you left your number in their yearbooks, along with a few HAGS and HAAS and canned responses like, 'You are awesome, I luv u <3 <3' haven't CALLED you yet (or in my case, I drew magical animals from a rear end view and wrote 'slap the flying elephant's butt'....i wonder if their children will open their yearbooks and slap elephants' butts for generations to come).

How summer should be spent (if you have money. Which I don't)

or....you could be one of those people who checked out dozens of library books and downloaded French lessons on to your phone and volunteered at children's summer camps leaving permanent pit-stains in your favorite shirt. a.k.a. ME
one of my favorite library books:
Dramarama
by: E. Lockhart
First of all, the front cover flap is the best front cover flap you'll ever read. Sequins? Spandex? Falsetto? People in unflattering sequined spandex singing in a falsetto? What more could you ask for from a book?
Okay, here is the plot for the amazing (zing-zing) Dramarama. Sadye and Demi are going to Wildewood summer DRAMA CAMP. There they will endure bunions (from dancing), broken hearts, and busted (ugh. tried alliteration. failed.) vocal chords for the sake of musicals.  Sadye is a brilliant Ohio girl who longs for Something Green (Little Shop of Horrors) aka variety. Demi is a brilliant undercover gay who hasn't broken the news to his parents. Together they go to Wildewood. Hooray!!!!!

Wha-ta-tow! To boring summers!

Again, sorry. Really bad summary. But I can't spoil it for you. It is too much of an amazing book. Now, if you are an E. Lockhart veteran, you will know what I'm talking about when I say the endings are a pain in the bazookles. The books themselves, however, are too genius to pass up, even though the endings will make you want to have an excuse to break out Bohemian Rasberry and sob for a couple of hours with Trader Joe's Kleenex. Sadye is immensely complicated...but dear goodness is she absolutely wowness. I think we all have a little bit of her inside of us, although we don't want to admit it and I know you're tutting at me because it's so darn cliche. But it's true. She's really is self discovery personified. She's catty, she's a little conceited, but you bet she's going to blow your mind. This book did. E. Lockhart's books always do. CHECK IT OUT.

The rest of the nutshell? Re-reading The Lord of the Rings. Again. And again. And again.

OhmygoodnessIcannotwaittoreadthisbook: Belle Weather: Mostly Sunny with a Chance of Hissy Fits
or this book: MOCKINGJAY!!! AHHH!!! AHHH!!!

Ta-ta!

The Novelmaven

Do you like the birds???

I must admit, the birds are a nice touch.
(In case you are oblivious to what I am writing about, look in the upper right-hand corner...higher...aha! you've found them. Clever!)

TODAY'S AGENDA:
1.) I shall discuss a rather new-ish book that I am surprised no one is making a huge deal out of. Our minds should have exploded by now.

2.) I shall consume a pint of Ben & Jerrys.
YUM.

3.) PICTURE TIME!

okay, here's numero uno.

 Leviathan by Scott Westerfeld

What??? Why has no one I've talked to heard about it? It's steampunk and WW1 for GOODNESS SAKES. and there's pictures. Wait, let me rephrase that. AND THERE'S PICTURES. Now who is excited? No?
I loved how Westerfeld took a completely new take on World War 1, because until this time, I had absolutely no bloomin' idea what it was about: ex:
Me to Mom: What was WW1 about?
Mom:
Me to Mom: WHAT was WW1 about?
Mom: Dear, I'm busy.
Me: Was it the one with the Japanese?
Mom: No. That was WW2. I said I was busy. Did you not hear me?
Me: Then it was the Germans.
Mom: Please go bother your (insert genderized sibling). (how very Coraline-ish) And no. That was WW2.
Me: But the Germans and the Japanese were both going for world domination, right? And you can't split the globe in two if you want WORLD DOMINATION. So it had to be two separate wars.
Mom: No. *sigh*
In which I walk away.
That shows you the great extent of my world war history knowledge. But back to the Leviathan.

In case the name of Scott Westerfeld does not conjure any recognition whatsoever, he's the one who wrote the Uglies books. You should have read it by now, but in case you haven't, clickity on the linkity.

Leviathan's two main characters are a boy and a girl (no, REALLY?)--Aleksander Ferdinand and Deryn Sharp, a girl who's impersonating a boy (no, REALLY?) on a biologically engineered air-ship that resembles a whale (wait, WHAT?). Okay, sound interesting? I don't really want to give a summary, though.

The idea itself of the countries of Europe battling each other with robots (the Clankers) and genetically altered animals (Darwinists) is enough to spark some sort of interest, not to mention the marvelous writing of Westerfeld combined with PICTURES. Whoa. And one of the best parts is that Deryn Sharp is not stereotypical. I know, *sighs of relief*. Of course, Deryn is boy-ish, but it really doesn't strike me as horribly manly or I'll-snap-someone's-head-off-if-you-try-to-put-deodorant-on-me. I mean, some books talk about girls who want to be boys and I read those books and expect the girls to suddenly start a burping contest and scratch their bellies. (No offense...)
Aleksander. I'm not sure I see too much of his character except being a little...eh...whiny. Of course, it is hard to let character shine through with such a fast-paced storyline and things being thrown at you left and right, but I still found that I didn't see Aleksander so much as a person than a prop. Definitely the highlight of the book was seeing Westerfeld's imagination really germinate---I mean FLYING JELLYFISH?! It was also good that he was able to balance it with enough history and familiarity.
So...overall??? It's got to be one of the best steampunk books I've ever read, ever. Ever. LINKITY LINK: LEVIATHAN!!
Oh, and look up the trailer, it's AMAZING.
By the way, there's going to be a sequel. On October 5th. Behemouth. I'm going to pee in my pants.

My Very First Blog

Ahahaha.
You would think this would be a momentous occasion. Trumpets blowing behind me, miniature dogs yapping , and girls clad in ridiculously sparkly leotards waving batons...
And why?
This is the Novelmaven's first, public appearance in the internet world. YAY! I know, I've been living under a rock. (Random person: Do you have a twitter account? Me: I'm not a bird. *sigh*)


On other, less depressing subjects. In case you haven't noticed I like books!!!

On books:

When people ask "What is your favorite book?" my answer shall, and always will be, thus:
I can give you my top five favorite books so far in eight separate categories!
In which they walk away.

When people ask "What are you reading right now?" my answer shall, and always will be, thus:
Several hours of analysis of my current reading list, which usually includes five or more delightful books.
In which they walk away.

When people ask "Do you have a facebook account?" (which, I conclude in an afterthought, is completely irrelevant to my previous writing excursions...) (and which they do in exorbitant numbers!!! I wonder why?) my answer shall, and always will be, thus:
No. (And something else, depending on the person)
In which I walk away. Unless I am on the phone. Then I bite into a (insert food of your choice) defiantly.

When people ask "Can you recommend me a book?" my answer shall, and always will be, thus:
Me: What do you like to read?
Them: 1._________ or (and I bury my face in the hands at the thought) 2."I don't read" or 3."I like books about talking dogs"
Me: to 1. ______ ______ ______ and ______ or perhaps _______ to 2. I have the greatest sympathy for you. to 3. Blink.

The Novelworm